Lord Howe Island – A Short Trip Back in Time

A worthy consolation prize for a cancelled Tassie road trip

It was with great reluctance that I cancelled the road trip of Tasmania which I’d been planning for most of the year prior. Locked down for five months last year, I dreamed of the eventual relief and freedom at the end.

Then Omicron got in the way.

There’s every chance I could have proceeded without drama. No government rules or restrictions were stopping me – but case numbers and supply chain issues took away any sense of confidence. The worst case scenario could have stranded me and cost a fair chunk of coin too. But it was the best case scenario which caused me to cancel. Even at best, the experience wouldn’t have been the same. So I saved the apple isle for another year, and found myself another isle a little closer to home – Lord Howe Island.

A two-hour flight from Sydney in a Dash-8 was all it took to get there. Plus, it’s under the jurisdiction of NSW so I didn’t even have to worry about crossing state borders. I touched down, checked into my accommodation (they don’t use locks, keys or room numbers), hired a bike and set off cruising around. Cycling is easily the best way to get around. Bikes outnumber cars, and the speed limit for motor vehicles is 25km/h so you share the roads with ease. Bike racks are sprinkled across the entire 12km stretch of the island – and again – no locks are required. Going for a hike and don’t want to carry everything? Leave it in the bike basket. It’ll be right where you left it when you return. Only 400 people are allowed on the island at any one time, so it keeps the place pristine and honest.

Furthermore, there is no mobile coverage on Lord Howe Island, which only added to the charm and makes it the perfect place to disconnect from the world. Old Telstra phone booths are sprinked across the island if you need to make a free local call to book a tour or dinner. I probably hadn’t used a phonebooth in 20 years prior to this trip!

It’s also a bird lovers paradise. With no natural predators, the unique birdlife has no reason to fear people – to the point where you sometimes had to be careful not to step on a nest, or worse, a bird. Banyan trees and Forky trees dominate the landscape.

I love sea stack. This side of the island reminded me a little of the Oregon coast

There were no shortage of bushwalks either, only a shortage of time. So I ended up running around like a madman squeezing in as many of them as I could (which left me aching for three days upon my return home). The biggest of all was the trek up Mt Gower – 875 metres through the clouds and mud at a steep incline, including sections of rope climbing. Unfortunately the cloud cover at the top was too dense to witness the rewarding view, but a lower vantage point offered spectacular sights regardless.

Much like the bird life, the fish were not afraid to say hello, coming right up to the shoreline at Ned’s Beach. The hut by the beach has food if you’re keen to give them a feed. Coral and Turtles were also sights on offer on the other side of the island, but I didn’t have my camera for that day.

Unfortunately the weather further out to sea didn’t sync up to enable me to see Ball’s Pyramid up close – but I suppose that’s just one more reason to return.

Right up to your feet!

Ear Candy 2022.03 – Bruise My Brain in the Pouring Rain

Takaya Katsuragawa

Radio singing from the corner of the kitchen
I got the oven on, I got the onions wishing
They hadn’t made me cry, filling the sink with dishes
Letting them air dry, waiting for the wind’s permission

Somehow, summer is over despite feeling like it never really started – stolen by La Nina and Omicron. And we continue to live through history. In the scheme of things, I’m certainly very fortunate when I have the capacity to be pissed off by weather (especially when that very weather is a catastrophic problem in other parts of the country).

As for the tunes – Animal Collective dropped their best album since 2009’s Merriweather Post Pavilion. Solid from start to end. SASAMI’s full album is worth a listen too.

Ravyn Lenae & Steve Lacy and Neil Frances bring some tight, thumping, sexy as fuck tracks which inspired me to add a Prince classic as well. It just felt right.

Kurt Vile returns in fine form with the psychedelic Like Exploding Stones which will have you melting into the floor. One of the nicest dudes around too. Last time he played Vancouver I met him wandering a street in West End prior to the gig, looking for the cafe I had just left. I couldn’t muster any more than “looking forward to the gig tonight” and he seemed genuinely chuffed.

And Big Thief continue to bring pure bliss. They’re right up the top of my list of artists I need to see when they (hopefully) make it to our shores.

Ear Candy 2022.02 – La Niña con La Tos Picante

Hey, I am feeling lucky now
As we melt into the couch
And I think it’s going to rain again today

And I think I’ve lost my mind
Spending all this time inside
Now my body’s gone to shit but I feel fine

Paul White

Songs of a steamy summer of improvised lockdown. Drinking a Dark & Stormy as the day transforms itself to match your cocktail. La Niña’s clouds roll in at the end of humid days spent alone.

The hospitals are full and the supermarket shelves are empty.

Everything is fine for a moment during those post-work swims.

Everything is simple ’til it’s not

Republic Model Proposal

I’ve been a member of the Australian Republic Movement for some time now. My support of the idea has never wavered, but my belief in the prospect of getting it done has. So, it’s good to finally see some movement to the Movement.

The ARM has announced their new proposed model. It’s good to finally see it released. I’ve contributed thoughts, time, and support to the development of this proposal over the last two years. I’m delighted to see that a lot of my opinions have been accommodated here. In particular:

  • The word “President” has been removed from all of the material, with a title yet to be determined. For many people with a limited understanding of the system, the word President will trigger images of a US system. Even though this couldn’t be further from the truth, language is an important shorthand to get messages across. I’m still hoping for a unique Australian title, perhaps derived from a First Nations language.
  • The new Head of State would not be allowed to circumvent legislation (which the royal family are currently allowed to do). Just because they don’t, doesn’t mean they won’t. Convention is becoming less conventional.
  • The PM (a position not currently mentioned in the constitution) would no longer be able to unilaterally sack the Head of State, as they can currently do to the Governor-General. The parliament would be empowered to do so in extreme circumstances.
  • Given the above, it improves the current system in practical ways, not just symbolic.

I’m well aware this topic is not top of mind for most people right now who are battling the clusterfuck of piss-poor lazy government – struggling to get food, RATs, vaccines. But the Queen, who is 95, will not be around much longer, and soon enough her son will take over. The idea of continuing with this foreign unaccountable celebrity family at the top of the chain is ludicrous. The system is broken.

The full proposal is explained here.

Bushwalks to Beaches

After two months of bullshit rain and cold temps, the Christmas / New Year break really turned on the weather, and since it couldn’t be spent at the pub or with friends thanks to Omicron, I took the opportunity to get out and do some trails and find a beach away from the crowds.

Resolute Beach Loop Trail

First, I went north into Ku-ring-gai Chase National Park to west head. I’m mostly certain I’ve not been to this part of the park before and it seems I’ve been missing out. Resolute Beach is one of my new favourites. Good bushland too, and good to see everyone having fun in the water.

Resolute Beach

Palm Jungle loop track

Next I headed south into Royal National Park, getting up pre-dawn and hitting the road to get in there before the expected crowds. I was parked at Garawarra Farm at 7am and hit the trail. This trail had it all – eucalyptus scrubland, “jungle” palm tree bush, grassland and beach.

The morning light was crisp and bright, and the temperature climbed rapidly. I got to Burning Palms Beach by 9am and jumped straight into the water. There’s nothing quite like that feeling you get when the beach peeks between the trees of the trail in front of you.

2021: Perhaps The Most Useless Year of My Life

A year characterised by a lot of walking loops around the neighbourhood

2020 was a real shit of a year. Dealing with Covid, lockdowns, and the immense stress of trying to move back home. The fear of disease, and the fear of being locked out of my home country left me with some form of mild PTSD in the early stages of this year. But even amongst all that bullshit, I achieved the monumental task of getting home, and I squeezed in a couple of epic road trips in Alberta and Western Australia along the way.

2021 was a year of nothing. It was a whole lot less stressful, but also a lot emptier. Bereft of achievement, life progress having been kneecapped by the same culprit time and time again.

It was a year of being paralysed. Half of the year was consumed by official lockdowns, the other half by a self-imposed semi-lockdown. Two years into this, I’m now having to choose between a social life or a family life. The fear remains that you can’t take up new hobbies, meet new people, go for a beer or go to the gym without killing your parents weeks later.

It wasn’t all doom and gloom. I finally got back into making tunes again. I hope to have something original to share in 2022, but until it’s a little more polished here’s a cover I punched out when I was learning

Until two weeks ago, I hadn’t actually known anyone who’d gotten Covid personally. I now know one, and I suspect that will increase rapidly in the weeks ahead. Best case scenario, this is the “ripping the band-aid off” of the pandemic and this time next year it’s behind us (as is this government and the corrupt lazy fuck at the top). Fingers crossed!

I did purchase a vacuum cleaner for the first time this year. I think that just about sums it up.

Top music and shows for the year below…

Music

My year end playlist, comprised of songs which all landed in my top fifty plays, and which were released after December 2020 – chosen for play count, as well as thematic content and musical range.

Most played song was Alien Crime Lord, by a long way. Awaiting a new album from The Voidz, I also gave their back-catalogue a lot of attention.

Streams

I didn’t catch a lot of movies this year, but Dune wins regardless. My first (and only) trip to a theatre in two years was worth the wait.

The White Lotus was my favourite series for the year.

I Think You Should Leave with Tim Robinson (Season 2) kept me laughing, as did It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia (Season 15) – which was also far more brilliant than a show should be fifteen seasons into its life.

Streams 2021 Sep Oct Nov

Series

  • Succession (Season 3)
    This show just gets better and better. It is now up there with Better Call Saul as the only series to which I salivate as I await new episodes (I’m not the only one). The cast is just phenomenal, as is the writing. And I have no idea where it will go next.
  • Squid Game
    This was terrific. Mind you, the style and themes do all the heavy lifting. Without the distinctive visuals, intense subject matter and class war themes, you might be left thinking more about that dead end plot line with the cop (whose phone battery seems to last days), an organ harvesting storyline which went nowhere, and the overly drawn out nature of the story (that last episode in particular was a drag). Still, a highlight of the year despite these pet peeves.
  • Dexter: New Blood
    The original run of this show had the worst final season and final episode of any show, ever. Somehow, I was still up for more eight years later. Thankfully, it’s a return to form (thus far anyway. At time of writing there’s still four episodes remaining). Worth a look for fans of the series before it turned bad.
  • Ted Lasso
    What a great first season of a show, followed by a clusterfuck of a second to undo all the good vibes of the first. Season one is a great mix of drama, comedy and warmth. Season two was hot garbage. Much like Mythic Quest it doesn’t seem to understand what was appealing about the show in the first place (keep it light for a start), and overestimates my interest in the “world” of the show. I give zero fucks about B-characters. I don’t need to know more about them, or watch them go on LENGTHY side quests to find themselves. I sure as shit don’t need to know about the issues they had or continue to have with their father. It’s a simple light breezy show and the tone was set in season one. Keep it there. Suffice to say I won’t find out if they get back on track for season three because hit the ejection button on this rickety plane before I got to the end.
  • Foundation
    Well this sure was pretty. Some incredible and unique sci-fi visuals. Unfortunately that was about all it had for me. Perhaps my hopes were too high, but this was a chore to get through.
  • Curb Your Enthusiasm (Season 11)
    This season had a few weak moments, but Larry still makes me laugh. Will I continue to watch? Sure. Would I be sad if they stopped making it? Nope. Always Sunny on the other hand keeps me wanting more.
  • You (Season 3)
    Yes I watched this. Yes it is trash. Yes I knew it was trash going in.

Movies

  • Dune
    I’ve been waiting many many years for this one. When I heard Villeneuve was attached to direct, my anticipation only increased – and it did not disappoint. My first visit to the cinema in two years and it was well and truly worthy of the big screen.
  • The Father
    One of the best of the year. Very cleverly structured and perfectly executed. The less you know before hitting play, the better.
  • Free Guy
    Enjoyable enough but wouldn’t recommend. Plot wise, a bit like The Lego Movie meets The Truman Show with Ryan Reynolds doing his usual thing (which while fun, is really getting a little tired). Taika’s character shat me off too. But what really got to me was the godawful ending. The female lead is sold as a highly intelligent girl, yet somehow she is completely oblivious to her male friend overtly crushing on her for years. So, she’s not interested right? Or she became interested because he grew and changed? Nope. He does fuck all, goes to get a coffee and she suddenly notices all the creepy messages he left in the game for her. So when he returns with his coffee she’s *all over him*. What a steaming pile of Hollywood horse shit.
  • Jungle Cruise
    Does what it says on the label. Entertaining fun in the vein of Indiana Jones and The (Brendan Fraser) Mummy.
  • Nitram
    Fantastic performances and overall a very chilling film. My only gripe is that by the end I wasn’t entirely sure of the point of it all. Perhaps that it was all preventable? I guess that sense of unease might be the whole idea.

Docos

  • Woodstock 99
    Where the 90s died. Pretty alarming to watch now but they make the argument that a lot of what grunge and rap seeded in the early 90s mutated into an angry white male beast by the name of nu-metal. Somehow the messages within the lyrics were lost on a lot of people. I guess that same angry crowd is storming the US Capitol these days.
  • Watch The Sound
    This made for an interesting dive into different technologies, effects and concepts of music production within the last 40 years. Especially interesting given I was diving into some of these effects myself during lockdown.
  • Shirkers
    Really quirky and fascinating doco. I went in blind, which is best. You never quite know where it’s headed or what the point is, but come out of it feeling as though you’ve watched something unique.
  • Inside Central Station
    I love this stuff. In another lifetime I could see myself involved in infrastructure somehow. It was pretty eye-opening to see the amount of work that goes on behind the scenes to keep Sydney moving.
  • New York Super Airport
    Similar to above, a doco about infrastructure and engineering, and I lapped it up. It covers the impressive reconstruction of New York’s LaGuardia airport, completed whilst the airport remained functional.
  • Q: Into The Storm
    I’ve stayed out of the loop with the ins and outs of this cesspool. This HBO doco was pretty thorough and engaging. Really makes one reflect on where the balance sits between pros and cons of the internet.

Games

Walking a dystopian version of Vancouver in Backbone
  • Backbone
    I fired this up knowing little about it and found myself on the streets of a dystopian version of Vancouver (albeit not named as such – but the inspiration is clearly there right from the game map to the scenery). Beautiful artwork, engaging story. Good to see a story-driven adventure work so well on a console.
  • Mini Motorways
    Well this just consumed a lot of lockdown time. Addictive, fun, and frustrating. Sim-City meets Oilswell.

Heidecker Parodycast on OHL

“Science is amazing. Animals are interesting.”

This is genius. Last year he delivered the best stand up special I’d seen in a long time and today Jeremy Levick and Rajat Suresh join Tim Heidecker to parody “Gwyneth Paltrow for men” and “the valedictorian of summer school”, Joe Rogan.

That Fuddruckers backdrop is inspired.

Rogan is the Jimmy Fallon of podcasting, and every bit as cringe.

Ear Candy 2021.11 – Novembrrr

Cinta Vidal

This weather is bullshit. It’s mid November, lockdown is over and I’m finally ready to start my year and squeeze what I can out of the remaining weeks. But it’s also way too fucking cold and rainy, so I guess we’ll just ride this one out and try again in 22.

Here’s my last playlist for the year, featuring some lazy early summer tunes – plenty of fresh finds, a couple of old classics to match the mood, and a Christmas tune to round it out.

Ear candy returns in February on the other side of silly season.

Ear Candy 2021.10 – Pretty Songs

Lacatusu Andrei makes some sweet dystopian art

Nevermind turned thirty in the last week. I was eight years old when it was released, and so can’t claim to have been all over it at the time. I do distinctly remember a school dance in Year 7 when Smells Like Teen Spirit played and clearly that stuck with me for a reason, but largely I didn’t really appreciate Nirvana until ten years after their day.

I recently watched Woodstock 99, a HBO documentary exploring the disastrous music festival, where the 1990s died at the hands of Fred Durst, a lot of angry young men, and corporate exploitation.

The 90s started off with a cultural bang of creative energy and by the time the decade ended it felt like everyone had played a game of telephone and spat out an entirely different violent and misogynistic message at the end. I’ve added In Bloom to this month’s playlist, since it basically predicted this very situation.

But aside from all of the above, I was reminded of how bizarrely walled off and tribal Gen-X music goers were from one another – attaching a fierce cultural identity to their taste in music. The attitude of “if you listen to something from the sixties, you suck” or “if you like a top forty artist, then I hate you as I hate them” and the passive-aggressive “I like music which uses real instruments”. It’s a curious attitude which still seems to persist to this day in many of the generation above me.

I can’t help but wonder if these same types have now attached a political cultural identity along the same lines.

Lockdown is over in just a few days. Here’s some tunes!