I wanna get drunk I wanna get stoned I wanna give up I wanna go ho-o-o-ome
Chalk Tablet Towers (not all lyrics need to have depth)
I haven’t had a lot of new music on my radar this month, what with the whole moving-back-to-Sydney thing. I’ve been back now for three weeks and have spent the entire time consumed by trying to lock in a home – and being unable to focus on much else. But now that I have a place to move into in two weeks, the excitement of a new life can finally begin. I’ve been waiting over a year for this moment (since I decided I’d move back to Sydney but stuck around to attend two weddings which never happened).
Nevertheless, I’ve put together this month’s dozen tunes. Gorillaz dropped their best album since Plastic Beach with Strange Timez last Friday. It works so much better than I expected, given it’s the first album to be constructed piece-by-piece without an overarching narrative. It even has a couple tracks which sonically hark back to their self titled debut. I’m pumped to see what they do animation-wise with their upcoming tour.
My collection of PC games which still lives at my parents’ home and I can’t bring myself to get rid of them
As I’ve mentioned previously, when I think back to my childhood, two images come to mind – riding my bike around the endless suburban streets of western Sydney, and playing computer games as much as I was allowed. Name a PC game from 1983 to around 1998 and chances are I’ve played it. From Commander Keen to Command and Conquer; Castle Adventure, Descent, Prince of Persia, Scorched Earth, Eye of the Beholder, Lemmings, Supaplex, JetPack, Earthsiege, Alone in the Dark. The list goes on.
But most of all I loved Sierra games. In the 80s and early 90s, Sierra On-Line dominated the PC gaming market. I loved them so much that I had dreams of one day working there. But in the late 90s, as the company deteriorated and eventually closed down, so too my interest in gaming dwindled.
At this time, every other game seemed to be another shooter with little-to-no story nor characters with whom to interact. Funnily enough, one of the last Sierra-published-games I got into was Half Life (which I loved). But mostly all I saw was a sea of sameness and as such I switched my attention to teaching myself 3D animation, website design and coding – all of which revolved around making fan content for my favourite series Space Quest. My goal switched from playing to creating.
Two books (the first two listed above) have been released in the last few months which have given some insight into the history of Sierra On-Line – how it began, how it thrived, and how it spectacularly fell apart. I devoured both books in only a couple of sessions.
At 8 years of age I tried to win over girls as Larry
King’s Quest was always their crown
Police Quest keeping it gritty
Freddy Pharkas Frontier Pharmacist
Space Quest. There’s nothing like it.
The Sierra Adventure is a work of love, written by a fan with the backing of a number of other fans via Kickstarter. It chronicles the company from its early days to its unfortunate end, highlighting the key games, designers and technologies along the way. Sierra’s success was found in its designer-driven approach and its technological boundary-pushing. No great work of art is designed by committee. As a Sierra fan, you always felt like part of a club or family, and got to know the game designers in the same way you would the author of a book. In the early days you could even call the designer to talk to them directly when you got stuck.
Unfortunately this approach was also expensive. An adventure game requires, story, dialogue, and characters. A successful game would sell around 250,000 copies and require a budget of around a quarter of the expected revenue. By the mid-nineties these numbers just weren’t competitive. Shawn Mills says it best:
A cultural change occurred in the early nineties that saw computers become a staple in most homes. They were no longer just for the tech-savvy, and as more and more people began using them throughout the decade, games and software were simplified to reach a broader audience.
More importantly, the technological advancement to 3D would become one of the major downfalls of the point-and-click adventure. While fast-paced, action-oriented games increased in popularity, the more cerebral adventure genre no longer dominated the market.
Shawn Mills, The Sierra Adventure
Sierra pushed the boundaries of what was possible in a PC game by embracing new technology. Soundcards changed everything and enhanced the experience. I still listen to these regularly.
Not All Fairy Tales Have Happy Endings – written by Sierra’s co-founder and CEO for most of the company’s life, Ken Williams – covers similar ground from the perspective of the ultimate insider. It’s far more business-oriented, which becomes fascinating when considering what led to both the successes and failures of the company.
A few highlights:
Sierra made an offer to purchase id Software following the release of Wolfenstein 3D, which failed mostly due to stubbornness. Pride can be a bitch. Imagine the future which might have followed.
Ken Williams was adamant about games being driven by the singular vision of an individual designer – a belief I strongly agree with for any decent creative endeavour (“if you were to take the two greatest book authors in the world and have them collaborate on a book, the result would not be as strong as their producing two independent books“). When new management took over, they used numbers and spreadsheets to assign people to projects. Original game designers were placed on games for which they had no passion while others were placed in charge of their original creation with little to no understanding of the world which had been created over fifteen years.
Sierra (and Microsoft) benefited from IBM’s fear of government anti-trust laws. IBM wrote into their contracts that each company must make their product available elsewhere. As such, when IBM caught a cold it hit them harder and allowed Sierra to sail off with other manufacturers.
The concept of a game “engine” which could be repurposed for new games without having to be coded from the ground up was pioneered by Sierra’s SCI. It’s what allowed them to push out ten times more titles than their competitors. It was also amusing the see the parallels with my own experience in the VFX industry as creatives would become frustrated with updates under the hood.
It struck me how much the experience of working in the gaming industry at that time lines up with my own experience working in the film industry. Bill Gates is paraphrased in the book: “when you are in a business that depends entirely on having a series of hits, it’s just a matter of time until you fail“.
What other game besides Space Quest III tasks the player with rescuing its own designers from their bosses who whip them as they work
Invariably, in a company that grows the way Sierra grew, innovation gives way to emulation. Whereas Sierra’s management once strove to make it solid, profitable, and yet fun, they now strive to dominate other companies, force annual growth in the double digits, and (Like so many other companies) cut jobs mercilessly to improve the bottom line and thrill the stockholders.
Josh Mandel, echoing a sentiment true of any company
Not All Fairy Tales was written thanks to Ken being trapped indoors during the pandemic. In a similar way, my desire to explore again the possibility of creating my own game has risen with all the time I’ve had stuck indoors this year. I’ve been learning Unreal Engine and making my own digital art again and my mind has exploded with ideas of how one might tackle an adventure game in 2020. I’ll save that for another time.
I’ll never pass a lonely railway line without snapping a shot. They have an old-world romantic mystery to them which gives me a strange sense of calm, hope and wonder. I’m also really just an 8 year-old-boy who loves trains.
Well, I made it back. Six months of isolation (save a handful of exceptions in July and August), two months of sleepless nights and stress, six cancelled flights and 37 hours in a face mask later, I made it to Perth. There, I spent two further weeks isolated in a hotel. Ordinarily such a challenge may be met with anxiety. But when I received the regular mental health calls on my hotel quarantine phone I couldn’t help but scoff. Baby, this part is a breeze. I’m happy to be back.
I’d never spent so much time on my own as I have in the last year. Some of it was helpful for reflection. Some was helpful for learning new things (Unreal), and getting in touch with old hobbies (drawing).
But I really missed people. And it wasn’t until I was back here that I realised how much.
So I was released from quarantine, got in a car, and hit the road. I spent six days exploring north of Perth soaking up the Australian landscape and a Covid-free world with full pubs and none of the pretension I’d become so drained by in Vancouver. Red dirt, wildlife and sunsets over turquoise waters.
Driving around the Peron Peninsula gave an incredible sense of freedomThe Pinnacles. Just myself, the desert and the wildlife.Turns out Pink Lake is actually pinkSomething as basic as this could be the template for a better Aussie flag
I then moved on from Western Australia to Adelaide where I spent ten days exploring the surrounding area soaking up wine and good friends. The biggest surprise was the Adelaide hills – a feature far underplayed in their marketing. It may be my favourite feature of the place.
Sunsets in Adelaide really are something elseClassic mammalian play behaviorThis trail was magic
You got sick from a lolli, lolli, lollipop You feel free when you’re killing me
Tom Fec (aka Tobacco) is a musician whose sound can’t be described by use of comparison to other artists. Instead, I tend to think of a blender in which bubblegum, rainbows, sunshine, lipstick and workout videos are mixed with horror movies, demons, sweat, bodily fluids and acid.
I was familiar with his work as a member of Black Moth Super Rainbow (in particular Dandelion Gum) long before I’d heard of his work as Tobacco. I loved the dreamlike bliss which BMSR captured. Dandelion Gum is 45 minutes of low-fi psychedelic electronic hymns. You could close your eyes and picture yourself laying with the one you love in an open grassy field on a sunny day – a slight breeze carrying the smell of flowers and popcorn – as you held hands and melted into the earth. You melted into each other, and by the end you, your girl, and the field were one and the same.
Well, that’s the imagery I always conjured anyway.
As Tobacco, he takes this aesthetic and adds some crunch. There are blissful moments, but also moments of horror and creepiness. Maniac Meat is Fec’s second album under this moniker, but it was the first I heard (Fucked Up Friends is also worth a listen, and has one of my favourite album covers of all time).
From the first listen I was hooked. It explodes right out of the gate with Constellation Dirtbike Head – a song that begins abruptly as though you’ve already walked in late to a party. Fresh Hex kicks it up a notch with some alliterative imagery and power drums & spiraling synths. From there it goes up, it cools down, you get scared, then a warm synthetic hug grabs you.
Computer corrode connection counting camouflage cash Crystal canary in a coal mine Land a cortex cowboy kaleidoscope Like a concrete cactus cracking in a colosseum
Lyrically, Maniac Meat is more about the imagery that words and sounds create rather than literal interpretation
This is no snoozer. This is an album to get pumped and perhaps a little psychotic. Throw yourself against the wall then lie in a pool of sweat as your mind drifts out of your body. I love it, but it’s certainly not for everyone. I haven’t yet recommended this successfully to anyone. They just don’t understand. But that’s fine – maybe this one feels more special for the fact it’s just for me.
I went on from here to explore a whole world of related acts – more Black Moth, Tobacco, Demon Queen, Malibu Ken. If, like me you’re on board with Maniac Meat, then you’re in for a treat with the rest.
Every time I get an advertisement or a news alert on my phone for something Canadian
I’m a bit later with this month’s playlist. I’ve spent the last month packing, cleaning, stressing, travelling back to Australia, then sleeping and unwinding. I’ve also spent much more time listening to podcasts than music this month, so it’s not my strongest effort for new stuff.
Maligne Lake. It felt like summer, but the trees were already starting to move on
Well, I never made it to Palm Springs. And I didn’t make it to Italy or Greece either. But if there’s a silver lining, it’s that I got to have one last look at Canada before I left – and it was classic postcard Canada too, Banff and Jasper National Parks.
After 30 months in Canada I came to the conclusion that the country’s natural beauty is probably its greatest feature, and nowhere is more spectacular than the rockies.
So here’s a few snaps from my road trip from Calgary, along the Icefields Parkway and back. I saw incredible mountains, glowing glacial lakes (and shrinking glaciers), curious wildlife and powerful waterfalls.
The Forest My interest in this game resembles the bell curve of New Zealand’s COVID-case chart. I was lured in by two things – the “plane crash on a mysterious island” setup will always catch my eye; and quite simply that the required machine specs suited my laptop. So I got right into it, after some initial frustration with what I was meant to be doing (video above captures my mood). Building, exploring, discovering new weapons, fighting cannibals and mutants, and piecing together the story somewhat. The “somewhat” is the problem for me. I quickly grew bored as the game’s hazy goals, stacked up on some frustrating UI quirks and an impossibly dark nighttime look. More than half of the things you can build are purely decorative and serve no value or purpose to the game. Maybe it works better when played with friends? Possibly, although I doubt it. It needs more purpose, story and characters to hold my interest.
Series
Devs
Devs This was great. Created, written and directed by Alex Garland, so if you’re a fan of his previous work you’ll likely be into this too. It was thought-provoking, the soundtrack was fantastic, and the visuals were cool. Some sloppy performances didn’t hold it back.
Limmy’s Show I discovered this show after Limmy was a guest on Office Hours. I listen to most of Tim Heidecker’s comedy recommendations and this was definitely a winner – and it makes sense – it plays like a less crude, less nightmarish version of Tim & Eric, with more charming accents. It matched my sketch comedy tastes perfectly and I can’t believe I hadn’t heard of it until this year.
The Twilight Zone (2019) (Season 2) Thankfully, this improved on the first season, which mostly paid fan-service to the sixties series. This still meant that half of the episodes were built on a weak premise or poorly executed. But it was worth trudging through those for the other half.
It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia (Seasons 1-5) A show which has long alluded me – it’s never aired on any traditional channel, nor could it be found on any streaming platform to which I had access. I discovered it was available through my ISP here and it’s been part of my lunchtime workout routine since. “Who Pooped the Bed?” is a work of genius.
Solar Opposites Off-brand Rick & Morty. It’s entertaining enough. I binged the lot in a weekend, but did I need it? Nah.
Nathan For You I’ve seen most of this show a multiple times already, but not for a few years. Re-watching it only confirmed that it’s one of the most brilliant shows of the last ten years. If you haven’t seen it, you’re really missing out on some big laughs and clever ideas.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SmjHSNdHIv4
Docos
Love On The Spectrum This was really charming. It’s listed as “reality” but it plays more documentary-style and opened my eyes to a world I’m really unfamiliar with – yet found very relatable. I’ve had enough awkward dates of my own, without being able to cite autism as a reason.
I’ll Be Gone In The Dark An interesting spin on the classic true-crime doco where some of the light is shone back on the author herself. Michelle McNamara’s years of research led to an arrest following her death. Side note: I don’t know why but I can’t stand Patton Oswalt.
Movies
The Death of Dick Long This could have been better. Moments even felt like it wanted to be Fargo. It falls far short of that, but was still worth a look. It’s biggest problem is that it can’t decide whether to lean into the comedy or drama, and in turn waters down both.
The Florida Project I’m not sure I’d recommend this, but that’s not to say it lacked value. It captured the feel of the Orlando / Space Coast region of Florida with its bright colours, motels, and endless flat suburbia – some of which took me back to my own childhood of long hot summers riding my bike around the streets of western Sydney making up games to entertain ourselves. More importantly it captured a lot of the issues with America right now, contrasting Disneyland against the very real poverty of many, and the way many of these folks are dismissed and looked down upon rather than understood. Actually you know what, I would recommend this. Ignore my first sentence.
Ad Astra This looked awesome and tickled my sci-fi bones in a visual sense, but was otherwise forgettable.
The Fast and Furious series I’d managed to go this long without seeing a single movie from this franchise, so when they appeared on Netflix I decided I’d “educate” myself. The first three were a waste of time. Strangely they became more enjoyable as they leaned into the ridiculousness of the concept. Check-your-brain-at-the-door fun.
The Good, the Bad and the Ugly God this was long, but I see why it’s a classic. The soundtrack is still the best thing about it. RIP Ennio.
Starship Troopers Re-watched this after having not seen it for maybe 20 years. It’s still brilliant, and some of the themes have only become sharper with age. VFX largely held up, and Denise Richards had the same effect on me as when I saw this at 14 years of age. Sigh. I have yet to see Paul Verhoeven’s RoboCop (I was a bit too young on release), but knowing it’s held in a similar regard means it’s on the list.
I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference
There are moments in life that turn out to be clear turning points only on reflection. Then there are others that you knew at the time would chart completely different paths for the future. Choosing to drop out of Economics and instead pursue web development and animation was one from the former camp. Moving to Canada was in the latter.
I look set to wrap up on yet another job in the next four weeks in order to head home to Australia. Not only is this a clear turning point, but it’s one I’ve been craving. The last two and a half years have been rewarding for many reasons – sights, people, and let’s be honest, finances – but my personality has suffocated in this culture. Beautiful and easy as it is, it’s difficult to imagine a future in a place where you can’t be yourself. Also, aside from the first year here, I’ve felt as though I’ve had a lot more to offer at work than I had opportunity to contribute. I need to feel success and creative satisfaction in order to feel nourished. It doesn’t have to be at work – but I’ve always found work goals to be easier to achieve than others, so I tend to gravitate toward those.
With three large companies in Sydney now producing animated features, and Weta set to move into that space in the future, it feels ripe for opportunity back home (pandemic notwithstanding). I do approach a return to Sydney with the same hesitation one might have with trying to recreate an awesome party they once had – where the people are different and the memories too fond to compete with the present. But there’s a real momentum there for career development and at this it stage feels like the logical step – and if not my final destination, perhaps a stepping stone back to Wellington.
Looking back can often inform what to chase in the future. I’ve listed below the six most satisfying shows on which I’ve worked. Job satisfaction is always a balance – a lower paying job is fine if you have more time to pursue other goals and hobbies; a horrible product can be handled if you’re surrounded by a great bunch of people; a brutal schedule of overtime can be accepted more easily by engagement in a new role. Sometimes you strike gold and come away a whole bunch of positives. Mostly, the best jobs scratch these itches:
Creatively satisfying / unique
Intellectually stimulating
Being surrounded by a great team
Feeling valued and valuable
Rogue
My first job in the industry. I was lucky enough that I went straight into the world of film. I didn’t have to serve any time as a runner, nor in TVC or camera tracking – all common paths into small and mid size companies back in the day. I was modelling, texturing, doing lookdev, animating and lighting on an actual film that was destined for theatres. I was hyped and constantly surprised that I was capable of what was requested.
As if that wasn’t enough, afterwards I was invited to Melbourne to work directly with the director developing a pitch for a follow up feature. It never happened, but I wish it had. The concept was nuts.
Prometheus
My first official lead role, an incredibly exciting science fiction film, visually unique concepts, a great team – and I loved the end product. This one had it all. I’d also just bought an apartment and felt like I was kicking arse with life at a level I hadn’t since I was doing my Masters.
The company went out of business shortly after delivery, which was unfortunate. It pulled the rug out from under my life months out from my 30th birthday. Ultimately it forced me to spread my wings and proved beneficial, but it was a rough ride.
The Lego Movie
This was fun. A team of thirty lit and composited an entire film with very little overtime in six months. It was the most efficient operation I’d been a part of to that point – and nothing satisfies my soul quite like efficiency. There wasn’t a single dead link in the chain. The team was switched on, and every day was full of laughs. I felt at home. Still my favourite place to work to this day.
It looked beautiful, and was a technological feat.
Mad Max: Fury Road
This was the most unassuming job that became one of the most spectacular. At the interview I was told “it’s not that exciting, you probably won’t walk away with any shots for your reel or anything like that”. Obviously I joined just as things went up a notch cause, as everyone knows, this film is spectacular.
I worked with a small team of five. Everyone was a vital link in the chain. George Miller was in our cosy dailies sessions. We made jokes, sang sea shanties, and dodged the junkies on our coffee runs. It wasn’t perfect by any stretch (I remember being happy when it ended), but this was like working with a bunch of mates. There was no micromanagement. There was trust, and the work got done, and I would go home each day sore from laughter.
Alien: Covenant
My second official lead role, and the sequel to the film I was lead on previously. Another small, yet highly skilled and talented team (this seems to be a winning combination for shows I enjoy). If I could choose the kind of job I’m craving next, it would be everything this show offered, but for an animated feature.
I was given enough space to create the pipeline and workflow I desired, and so wasn’t left frustrated by one that didn’t work. I also usurped my way up the chain to plug inefficiencies there, and everyone on the team was an all-star with personality and good humour.
Spiderman: Into The Spider-Verse
This was brutal, but we knew we were making something special. It followed on from one of the easiest and most predictable (and boring) shows I’d ever done. Those have their place, but Spider-Verse was just what I needed to remind me that I still love what I do.
What’s more, I was able to contribute to the look and develop tools to be used by the team, as well as fill in as lead for a short while. I did not expect any of these opportunities to come at such a large company I had only just joined.
Benjamin Bardou makes impressive abstract video art
I’ve added a few more new release songs this month than the last couple. I’m desperately hungry for new music, but struggling to find much. Here’s some newie’s getting me by, along with a couple of classics. Not For All The Love In The World is an all-time work of art, as is the explosion at 1:23 on Desiree.
