Don’t ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody.
Took this from my front door. I’ll never tire of astrological entertainment.
Yeah, I’ve really been feeling a Holden Caulfield mood this month. People, man. But the tunes keep coming with my monthly playlist below. Biggest discovery for me this month is Squid out of Brighton. Their album Bright Green Field has plugged a post-punk shaped hole in my soul, with some James Murphy / Modest Mouse -esque vocal stylings and fresh and unpredictable musical progression. Get into it.
Some other thoughts…
Today was the coldest June day in Sydney in 122 years, which I loved cause I was able to wear my Canadian clothes without looking like a Sydney winter douche (side note: it was only 5 degrees colder than the same day, opposite season back in Vancouver) *gloat*
Gerry Harvey is a colossal prick, and the cloth that he’s cut from still wraps the world like Christo. When entitled boomers make room for youth we might have a chance of moving forward. Easily the most selfish group of people to have ever existed.
Sydney’s Super Tunnel Truth be told – this was my favourite show of the last quarter. Goddamn I love this shit – trains, infrastructure, design, engineering – and in my home city. What’s been done for public transport and infrastructure in the last five-ish years in Sydney has been impressive (and long overdue). I can’t wait to see more.
Feels Good Man I discovered Matt Furie in the relatively early days of the internet. I still own three t-shirts with his designs which I bought back in the days where I prided myself on my unique tee collection. His art and illustration was unique and I loved it. Fast forward a few years and I started seeing his Pepe character being used for memes. His art had been hijacked by a bunch of Trump fanboys. I had NO idea how deep the rabbit hole went, and felt sorry for him. Great doco, which raises questions around who owns art.
Old People’s Home for 4 Year Olds This was really charming and showed both the strengths and limitations of the two age groups.
Seaspiracy Hang around me long enough and I’ll have a rant about “pescatarians” who won’t eat meat for animal cruelty reasons (which has merit) – but yet happily consume a product (fish) whose industry wipes out one species after another with little scrutiny. So what I’m saying is, I watched this for validation of my meat consumption and minimal seafood consumption.
Series
On Cinema Oscer Special 2021 I am amazed by how brilliantly this show continues to deliver year after year. This special in particular was innovative in that it ran two separate live streams at once (one for Timheads, one for the Greggheads) as we witnessed the repercussions of Gregg’s murderous car attack last year. Heidecker in particular continues to impress by subverting expectations and playing with the medium itself.
For All Mankind (Season 2) This season started way too slowly and took far too long to get to the meat of the story – but it ended so well and reminded me why I loved the first season so much. That Mrs Robinson plotline was a little forced – but I’m willing to forgive it for Shantel VanSanten. Oof. One gripe – it doesn’t have enough fun with the alternate history of the world. Most of the history of the world outside the space program is identical to our own. Same songs, same leaders, same culture.
Manhunt: Deadly Games I remember the Atlanta bombing back in the day, although at only twelve years of age I was unaware of the details. Richard Jewell went through hell and this captures it in a really engaging way. Clearly the militia plotline was tacked on. I’m not sure how wise it was but I get why they did it. It rounds out the end of the story a lot better.
Wellington Paranormal (Season 3) Good for a laugh as always. Some gags hit, some miss. All a bit of fun.
Made For Love There’s been no shortage of shows which have clearly been pitched as Black Mirror or Twilight Zone -inspired. Any mention of the aforementioned shows will pique my interest. The trouble is though, for every brilliant Zone story there were six lacklustre ones. This is a lacklustre one. And one of my pet peeves – implausible bullshit sci-fi tech – was in abundance.
Mare of Easttown How about you assemble a whole bunch of characters I couldn’t give a fuck about and follow a bunch of dead-end plotlines, then introduce some more characters who have no relevance to the plot – and culminate them in a weak ending – but next time don’t tell me to watch it.
Last Week Tonight John Oliver is a funny guy, but this show is not particularly funny any more. It used to be a nice balance between comedy and insightful commentary and information. I’m not sure if it was Trump that broke him (like Trump-super-fan Stephen Colbarf) or the lack of an audience, but he just comes across as preachy and condescending now – which is guaranteed to shit me even when I agree with the points being made.
Movies
The Dry Beautifully made Aussie murder mystery. Cinematography and acting were fantastic.
I Am Mother Another clever Aussie sci-fi movie I missed from 2019. Really slick, great cast, the last act was a bit too long but not enough to spoil it.
Coherence Really clever sci-fi grounded around a group of friends at a dinner party. Must see for anyone who loves a thinker or a twist.
Richard Jewell I followed up the Manhunt series covering the same content by watching the Clint Eastwood cinematic version and found it felt a lot cheaper. While the series tacked on a phoney militia plotline, at least it handled the main story points a lot better than this.
Bad Trip Hilarious. Andre is brilliant.
Waterworld I’d never seen this and had known only three things – at the time it was the most expensive movie ever made, it was a flop, and it was a Mad Max ripoff. There isn’t even any subtlety to the ripoff. I enjoyed it enough, but it felt like a hard slog.
Run Simple thriller, well executed.
Godzilla vs Kong About what I expected.
The Mitchell’s vs The Machines Stunning visuals, with an oddly dated feeling plot (that dad is, say, 40 maybe? And he doesn’t understand smartphones? Screen-time as a theme feels more 2010 than 2021). Hopefully more animated features push visual experimentation.
Happily This sucked massively.
Games
Prey This was really cool and gave me flashbacks to the original Half-Life. The story was engaging and intricate, the balance between tasks and combat was right (I get so bored by too much of the latter), and the visuals weren’t anything remarkable but they were solid. Loved it.
Control Loved the visuals, the geometric art, the story, the concepts, and throwing bodies around. However, this game has such a godawful map and confusing spawning system which makes you replay sections of story and dialogue even though it remembers your progress beyond that point. Enemy spawning seemed buggy as hell in some sections too, with endless respawns. I’m certain it’s a bug, not a feature. Still, all in all, a fun ride, but I was bored of it long before I got to the end.
Anyone who knows me knows that I loathe the royal family. I distinctly remember as a child when I discovered that Kings and Queens were real things that still existed in the real world, and I was gobsmacked. Santa Claus made more sense – at least he was magical, not just a regular human elevated for being born. It’s absurd that such an institution should still exist at all – but it’s beyond ridiculous that it should exist in Australia.
As such, I generally avoid them as best I can. I skipped past The Queen’s Gambit for months, thinking it was another Crown or royal period drama. I also feel great discomfort at grown-arse adults who seem to idolise them. They are not above politics as many usually claim; they are unaccountable celebrities who use weddings and babies as marketing material to hold onto their power and wealth – and protect themselves from the law (*cough* Prince Andrew).
hear me out—instead of Meghan, we interview prince Andrew. and instead of Oprah, it’s the police
But schadenfreude got the better of me and I had to pay some attention to the latest drama. Now, I couldn’t stomach the interview itself, but I saw some clips. Gross phrases such as “speak your truth” (vomit) and unnecessary trips to the thesaurus with “falsehoods” (“lies” wasn’t good enough?) were enough to put me off watching the whole thing, but I got the gist – a heavy dose of high-school level gossip from rich people complaining about their privilege while an overrated (junk-science promoting) interviewer acts surprised at everything as though it hadn’t already been discussed prior.
What?!? That institution which has discriminated based on gender, wealth and religion forever is also racist? What a revelation!
The stuffy old antiquated English system expects you to be seen and not heard, and used as a prop for the media? And repress your feelings?! What a surprise!
A truer bombshell might have been the absence of these things. It doesn’t make them any less wrong, but the apparent surprise reveals how well the tabloid marketing works.
The media are picking sides to create more drama, but let’s be real – everyone involved is horrible, entitled, and narcissistic. Once upon a time, elite, entitled celebrities were able to demand, and receive the kind of glorification which would make an ancient Pharaoh envious. Back in the day the media and celebrities had a symbiotic relationship where they both lived in the same bubble and the rest of us had to just tolerate it. Those days peaked in the 1990s. The age of celebrity is dead – it was one of the benefits of the internet. The pandemic has only encouraged the democratisation of media. You only have to look at US late night talk show hosts working from home amid the pandemic and how amateur their efforts looked alongside long-time YouTubers. This doesn’t mean celebrity is gone or that it doesn’t still come with benefits – but it does mean that you no longer get a free pass simply for being famous. Ask Gal Gadot and her imagination.
Sitting on millions of dollars from Spotify and Netflix as you complain about not getting free security? It’s enormously out of touch.
The elevation of one individual for no reason other than their being “famous” or born into wealth has always been wrong – but it is abhorrent in 2021. It goes against the grain of the egalitarian values on which modern Australian society is (meant to be) built.
The royal family are effectively no different to the Kardashian-Jenners (although it could be argued they earned their wealth to a greater extent than the Windsors). Would you sit them at the top of your system of government and society?
I believe that the main element keeping this institution together is the Queen, and it further unravel upon her death in the next decade. In any case, Australia should have removed this anachronism a long time ago. There is absolutely no argument for keeping a foreign, unelected individual at the top of our societal and governmental chain. Especially when that individual doesn’t understand our culture or feel our pain or celebrate our successes. An individual from a country which slaughtered thousands of Australians in the late 18th Century.
Yes, a lot of good came as well, but that river stopped flowing a long time ago. There is nothing gained from keeping an unaccountable family which protects themselves from the rule of law – and is considered to be doing their best work when they are doing nothing.
We can, and should, do better.
I have no shortage of ideas on what “better” could look like. It starts with Constitutional recognition of Australia’s First Nations, and a number of other issues (distrust of politicians, corruption scrutiny for example) could be addressed in the process. But I’ll save that for another day.
Well I’ve made another lap around the sun and can no longer pass for mid thirties any more. But hey, late thirties is still not the big four-zero I suppose.
Somehow I find myself with PTSD related to my journey home from Canada. The stresses and anxieties of getting back here linger, triggered by a covid scare and cloudy weather at Christmas – and despite the glorious weather and improved opportunities and environment with which I am surrounded since. Four hours of sleep last night suggests my head doesn’t care about that.
I feel for everyone still stuck inside in other parts of the world, and for those still trying to get back to Australia. It’s shameful that so little has been done to assist them.
We’re chimpanzees with brains the size of planets. The logical, rational brain is in a fight with its chemical, emotional side. It’s little wonder the two often struggle to coexist.
Anyway, here’s some tunes! I’m pretty happy with this one…
Maybe happiness is this: not feeling like you should be elsewhere, doing something else, being someone else.
Isaac Azimov
But why are they called the Blue Mountains?
Moments before the Christmas break was due to kick off and “life as normal” seemed within reach, the clouds rolled in (literally and figuratively) and a new Covid cluster emerged in Sydney. Suddenly I was having Vancouver flashbacks.
But as usual for Sydney the clouds eventually moved on, and while Covid still lingers, it at least feels under control for now. Yes, I missed out on a lot of things I’d been looking forward to, but I did achieve one thing in my week off – I got some wheels!
(I also wore my thumb completely numb smashing through Ori and the Will of the Wisps in a week. That fucking spider boss can fuck right off.)
One of my goals for the next chapter of life now that I’m back home is to do more road trips around Australia, including off-roading and camping. I also wanted to visit some of the areas hit by the bushfires a year ago. The Blue Mountains seemed the most obvious place to start, so I gunned it out to Blackheath early on a Sunday morning and did two tracks. Each took around 2-3 hours with lots of stairs (my calf muscles were rooted on Monday and Tuesday).
I’ve seen these mountains countless times but never like this. Charred-black tree trunks still stood on the landscape like gravestones twelve months on. From within them, luminous-green branches pushed their way outward like a zombie hand bursting out of the dirt. Around the trees, flowing waters and full waterfalls gave life to the greenest grass I’d seen in those parts.
The clouds and rain which had caused annoyance the week prior were now providing me waterfalls to admire and watering holes in which I could cool off.
I’ll never pass a lonely railway line without snapping a shot. They have an old-world romantic mystery to them which gives me a strange sense of calm, hope and wonder. I’m also really just an 8 year-old-boy who loves trains.
Well, I made it back. Six months of isolation (save a handful of exceptions in July and August), two months of sleepless nights and stress, six cancelled flights and 37 hours in a face mask later, I made it to Perth. There, I spent two further weeks isolated in a hotel. Ordinarily such a challenge may be met with anxiety. But when I received the regular mental health calls on my hotel quarantine phone I couldn’t help but scoff. Baby, this part is a breeze. I’m happy to be back.
I’d never spent so much time on my own as I have in the last year. Some of it was helpful for reflection. Some was helpful for learning new things (Unreal), and getting in touch with old hobbies (drawing).
But I really missed people. And it wasn’t until I was back here that I realised how much.
So I was released from quarantine, got in a car, and hit the road. I spent six days exploring north of Perth soaking up the Australian landscape and a Covid-free world with full pubs and none of the pretension I’d become so drained by in Vancouver. Red dirt, wildlife and sunsets over turquoise waters.
Driving around the Peron Peninsula gave an incredible sense of freedomThe Pinnacles. Just myself, the desert and the wildlife.Turns out Pink Lake is actually pinkSomething as basic as this could be the template for a better Aussie flag
I then moved on from Western Australia to Adelaide where I spent ten days exploring the surrounding area soaking up wine and good friends. The biggest surprise was the Adelaide hills – a feature far underplayed in their marketing. It may be my favourite feature of the place.
Sunsets in Adelaide really are something elseClassic mammalian play behaviorThis trail was magic
I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference
There are moments in life that turn out to be clear turning points only on reflection. Then there are others that you knew at the time would chart completely different paths for the future. Choosing to drop out of Economics and instead pursue web development and animation was one from the former camp. Moving to Canada was in the latter.
I look set to wrap up on yet another job in the next four weeks in order to head home to Australia. Not only is this a clear turning point, but it’s one I’ve been craving. The last two and a half years have been rewarding for many reasons – sights, people, and let’s be honest, finances – but my personality has suffocated in this culture. Beautiful and easy as it is, it’s difficult to imagine a future in a place where you can’t be yourself. Also, aside from the first year here, I’ve felt as though I’ve had a lot more to offer at work than I had opportunity to contribute. I need to feel success and creative satisfaction in order to feel nourished. It doesn’t have to be at work – but I’ve always found work goals to be easier to achieve than others, so I tend to gravitate toward those.
With three large companies in Sydney now producing animated features, and Weta set to move into that space in the future, it feels ripe for opportunity back home (pandemic notwithstanding). I do approach a return to Sydney with the same hesitation one might have with trying to recreate an awesome party they once had – where the people are different and the memories too fond to compete with the present. But there’s a real momentum there for career development and at this it stage feels like the logical step – and if not my final destination, perhaps a stepping stone back to Wellington.
Looking back can often inform what to chase in the future. I’ve listed below the six most satisfying shows on which I’ve worked. Job satisfaction is always a balance – a lower paying job is fine if you have more time to pursue other goals and hobbies; a horrible product can be handled if you’re surrounded by a great bunch of people; a brutal schedule of overtime can be accepted more easily by engagement in a new role. Sometimes you strike gold and come away a whole bunch of positives. Mostly, the best jobs scratch these itches:
Creatively satisfying / unique
Intellectually stimulating
Being surrounded by a great team
Feeling valued and valuable
Rogue
My first job in the industry. I was lucky enough that I went straight into the world of film. I didn’t have to serve any time as a runner, nor in TVC or camera tracking – all common paths into small and mid size companies back in the day. I was modelling, texturing, doing lookdev, animating and lighting on an actual film that was destined for theatres. I was hyped and constantly surprised that I was capable of what was requested.
As if that wasn’t enough, afterwards I was invited to Melbourne to work directly with the director developing a pitch for a follow up feature. It never happened, but I wish it had. The concept was nuts.
Prometheus
My first official lead role, an incredibly exciting science fiction film, visually unique concepts, a great team – and I loved the end product. This one had it all. I’d also just bought an apartment and felt like I was kicking arse with life at a level I hadn’t since I was doing my Masters.
The company went out of business shortly after delivery, which was unfortunate. It pulled the rug out from under my life months out from my 30th birthday. Ultimately it forced me to spread my wings and proved beneficial, but it was a rough ride.
The Lego Movie
This was fun. A team of thirty lit and composited an entire film with very little overtime in six months. It was the most efficient operation I’d been a part of to that point – and nothing satisfies my soul quite like efficiency. There wasn’t a single dead link in the chain. The team was switched on, and every day was full of laughs. I felt at home. Still my favourite place to work to this day.
It looked beautiful, and was a technological feat.
Mad Max: Fury Road
This was the most unassuming job that became one of the most spectacular. At the interview I was told “it’s not that exciting, you probably won’t walk away with any shots for your reel or anything like that”. Obviously I joined just as things went up a notch cause, as everyone knows, this film is spectacular.
I worked with a small team of five. Everyone was a vital link in the chain. George Miller was in our cosy dailies sessions. We made jokes, sang sea shanties, and dodged the junkies on our coffee runs. It wasn’t perfect by any stretch (I remember being happy when it ended), but this was like working with a bunch of mates. There was no micromanagement. There was trust, and the work got done, and I would go home each day sore from laughter.
Alien: Covenant
My second official lead role, and the sequel to the film I was lead on previously. Another small, yet highly skilled and talented team (this seems to be a winning combination for shows I enjoy). If I could choose the kind of job I’m craving next, it would be everything this show offered, but for an animated feature.
I was given enough space to create the pipeline and workflow I desired, and so wasn’t left frustrated by one that didn’t work. I also usurped my way up the chain to plug inefficiencies there, and everyone on the team was an all-star with personality and good humour.
Spiderman: Into The Spider-Verse
This was brutal, but we knew we were making something special. It followed on from one of the easiest and most predictable (and boring) shows I’d ever done. Those have their place, but Spider-Verse was just what I needed to remind me that I still love what I do.
What’s more, I was able to contribute to the look and develop tools to be used by the team, as well as fill in as lead for a short while. I did not expect any of these opportunities to come at such a large company I had only just joined.
Benjamin Bardou makes impressive abstract video art
I’ve added a few more new release songs this month than the last couple. I’m desperately hungry for new music, but struggling to find much. Here’s some newie’s getting me by, along with a couple of classics. Not For All The Love In The World is an all-time work of art, as is the explosion at 1:23 on Desiree.
The final destination of my journey through Utah (and Arizona) was the one which had been on my travel list for the longest time – Lake Powell. I remember watching the original 1968 Planet of the Apes when I was a teenager and being intrigued by the bizarre landscapes. Bright clear turquoise-hued water lapped against golden sun-drenched stone and sand. It was other-worldly, and somehow idyllic and post-apocalyptic at the same time. I immediately did some research into where the film had been shot, and ever since then it sat on my travel list. It did not disappoint.
The temperatures during my road trip had been pretty hot, in the low 30s, but as I turned into Page Arizona, oven-door-heat blasted at me from all directions – and I loved it. Page was my base for three nights as I explored beautiful slot canyons and got to know the lake by foot, boat and from the top of a butte via helicopter.
Antelope Canyon
What are you smiling at?
My first stop on the way into Page was Antelope Canyon. Antelope is a slot canyon, which is a long, narrow, and deep channel with sheer rock walls. This system of drainageways hooks up to Lake Powell at the north where it can be explored by kayak. To the south they can be explored by foot. That’s where I dropped in.
There are several spots along the canyon that can be toured. I avoided the most popular one, preferring to avoid the busloads of tourists taking the same four photos. What I did see was incredible. The colours, erosion-worn texture and light play had me staring mouth-agape in all directions.
Those light beams
Horseshoe Bend
Sharp drop there
I approached Horseshoe Bend with partial reluctance. It’s perhaps the biggest tourist trap in the area, given it’s easily accessed by a short hike off a large parking lot at the side of a highway.
Despite this, it was still worth a visit. The scale was spectacular. The green Colorado River lapped against those Utah red rocks and I was able to get up right to the edge and watch as kayaks and speedboats zoomed by below.
I tried a polarising filter on my camera for the first time on this trip and got most use of it in this section to reduce glare on the water and see more detail within.
Lake Powell
Rich daylight
Soft dusk
With oven-heat blasting from all directions, I made sure to get down to the lake for a swim. The water was about 25 degrees, which some locals informed me was “too cold for a swim”. Warm enough for me! The water was clean and clear and incredibly blue-green. Small waves washed upon a sandy beach, and I was in the middle of the desert. I found it awesomely surreal.
After my swim I boarded a boat to venture further out onto the lake. Along the way we passed Tower Butte, rising 1600 metres above sea level – and I caught a glimpse of a helicopter hovering above. My afternoon was wide open and I was looking for a way to round out my trip, so on an impulse I purchased a ticket and two hours later I was on a chopper above the lake.
Helicopters are awesome.
Da choppa!
Took all the Dam photos I liked
Touched this magnificent butte
At the top of the butte, tiny lizards everywhere. Life really does find a way
I left Page and made my way back to Las Vegas. Due to my early flight I stayed the final night there – which was mostly spent stuffing my face at the Bacchanal all-you-can-eat buffet. The food was amazing, and I really did eat all I could before rolling back to my room.
But Vegas is a total dump, so after eating my body weight in food I took the shortest route back to my room.
Ennio Morricone blasted loudly from my car speakers as I zoomed along highway 313 toward Dead Horse Point State Park. Think of any film you’ve ever seen set in the old west – chances are it was shot either in Dead Horse or in Monument Valley. In this section of my trip I visited both of these spots.
Dead Horse Point State Park + Canyonlands National Park
A solar evaporation pond contrasts against a desolate landscape. Note the small patch of green lawn at the bottom middle of frame.
Dead Horse Point overlooks the Colorado River and Canyonlands National Park, and it was cool. I stayed here for about an hour walking along the edge of the canyon. Dramatic shapes and shadows form in every direction – the green edge of the Colorado river popping against the brown canyon.
Next I moved on to Canyonlands. I took less photos here. As spectacular as it was to experience hiking around, the scenery wasn’t terrifically different as I moved about.
Monument Valley
My alarm went off at five in the morning, and as the sun was rising I filled my tank with petrol and got moving to my next destination – Monument Valley. I wanted to get there before any potential crowds got in the way, particularly at the entrance, known now as Forrest Gump point – named for the spot where Forrest stopped his run across America. Thankfully there weren’t many cars around at all so I was able to get out onto the road and get some shots.
After about ten minutes another car pulled up behind mine and I met a couple of guys from California doing much the same trip as myself. I ended up in a convoy with them into the Navajo nation land. They had an off-road vehicle and invited me along to do the drive around the valley, where I was able to get some great shots.
This trip was the first time I’d ever used a tripod. It opened up a whole new world of photography of which I was previously unaware. I found a spot outside my room to set up and captured the colours changing across the mesas, then the stars above, and in the morning I shot the sun as it rose behind one of the mittens.
This shot is a composite of two photos – one from midnight and one from sunrise. Without a tripod these shots wouldn’t have lined up so perfectly, nor would I have been able to capture those stars without a lot more blur.
As spectacular as Monument Valley was, there really wasn’t a lot to do, so once I’d stayed the night I hopped in my car and ventured into the north of Arizona on my way to the last stop of my road trip loop…
